May 2004 Archives

Wanted: Dumber Daughter

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Me: Ellen, i said STOP.
Ellen ignores me.
Me (angrily): What part of STOP didn't you understand?
Ellen: Um..The 'P' part?
Me (wanting to be angry, but busting out laughing): Don't push it, kid.
Ellen smirks and falls silent.

When did I lose control?

Official movie blog?

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All time favorite book Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy is being, finallly, made into a real movie. Of course, it's years after the wonderful author Douglas Adams died suddenly, and tragicallly, but hopefully it will still be good, and true to the original. I guess there's even an argument that if he were alive and working on it, the Hollywood leeches would try to force him to change things to better fit Hollywood, and now that he's gone, there will be such an outcry if the slightest license is taken that it will be more accurate and less Hollywood. We'll see...

But, that's not what this post is about (well, a little, but obliquely). Apparently, the screenwriter responsible for translating Adams into film has a blog and interviewed himself. Haven't read it yet, but I'll get to it tomorrow.


Something clever

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I like the rare instances when I do something clever, no matter how unimportant. So here's something I did today. Maybe it will be useful for you in the future.

I had some cold Dim Sum to warm up. I think the microwave does a crappy job, and getting out the bamboo steamer is a pain. I looked through my pots and pans and found an egg poacher that I bought for almost nothing at williams sonoma and I used that. Filled the bottom with water, put the dim sum in the little pans, cover it and it's nice and moist but easy to clean and great for one person.

Just a thought.

How can I stay mad?

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I come upstairs and Ellen's in the tub, crying. Talking to Kim, I find out that she had given her a hard time when she wanted her out of the tub, and she told her that she could get herself out (as opposed to her helping her out of the tub). Now, she's perfectly capable of getting out by herself, and she was tired of standing there and getting lip.

So she gets out of the tub, wailing, and I push her off to her room, angry at this outburst. Her response, while weeping (remember, she's 6...):

"I wanted Mommy to help me out, but she didn't even give me the opportunity..." *choked sobs*..."It's not fair! She just refused to help me!"

Now, I'm listening to this diatribe, and trying SO hard not to crack up, but I couldn't. I started smirking, which just made her louder, but I just couldn't help it. God, I can't wait to hear what she comes out with as a teen when she actually has a real vocabulary.


Birds, Act III

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Wednesday morning, 6:10 AM. Wife and I are asleep. Windows open. Beautiful evening/morning out. Suddenly (or suddenly to me) there is a swell in the ambiant noise. Something is happening. Yes, it's...BIRDS. Hundreds of birds. Talking. Singing. Eating. Commuting. Who the F**k knows what hundreds of birds do other than MAKE NOISE.

Wednesday morning, 6:15 AM. Stumble out of bed. Close windows. Turn on A/C. Try desperately to get more sleep.

G-d Damned birds...

Green Popcorn

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There's an article in today's NY Times about the Brood X Cicadas, and essentially how they're NOT locusts (which are grasshoppers, BTW). This paragraph caught my eye:

Consider the difference in attitude in two novels, wildly different in location and in artistic value, but both with locust scenes. Dr. Lockwood quotes from "On the Banks of Plum Creek" by Laura Ingalls Wilder:

"Laura tried to beat them off. Their claws clung to her skin and her dress. They looked at her with bulging eyes, turning their heads this way and that. Mary ran screaming into the house."

In "Things Fall Apart" by Chinua Achebe, African villagers react differently when the flying cloud blocks the sun.

" 'Locusts are descending,' was joyfully chanted everywhere, and men, women and children left their work or their play and ran into the open to see the unfamiliar sight." The villagers gather the locusts, roast them and dry them in the sun and eat them for weeks. The same insects are a scourge to farmers and a boon to gatherers. Plague and bounty. Tragedy or popcorn from the sky. What I am looking for, and have not yet found, is a shirt that bears a message sometimes applied to cats, or whatever animal displeases the wearer. It works fine for cicadas, even if you like them.

"So Many Cicadas. So Few Recipes."


Bye bye birdie

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To those of you following the plight of the noisy sparrow and the battle of the Nest under the A/C, it has apparently been won by the persistantly sleep deprived daddy. Although the prior solution, a block of wood that sort of blocked the entrance to the A/C didn't quite work (ok, it didn't work AT ALL), the new solution, a full Poland Spring bottle slid into the track beneath the A/C seems to have. This morning, for the first time in 3 days, no bird. Ah, precious sleep.

Now, I just need to get home from work before 12:00 AM and it will be perfect.

F**king birds...

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Saturday: Woken up to the incredibly loud sound of birds outside the window. Kim's and my eyes shoot open at around 6 and with difficulty, we get back to sleep.

Sunday: Again, 6 AM, birds are SCREAMING at us. No sleep. So, that afternoon, I open the A/C partition (it's a window A/C, so there's that accordian-style blocker to keep it in place) and sure enough, there's a bird's nest UNDER the A/C! The loud birds weren't outside the window, they were in the room, usnig the metal A/C as a PA. So, out goes the bird's nest, in comes a block of wood to keep the little creep out.

Today (Monday): Bird is back. I don't know what he's doing, but the damn thing, on a day where i can actually sleep in because I'm working late, is screaming at me again. This time, I smacked the partition, sending him flying. I'm going to catch him and eat him next, I swear. I'm exhausted because of a 2 oz. sparrow.



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The site's been down for about a week when, i THOUGHT, my OS X installation died. After trying this and that, I ultimately reinstalled, and that failed. And then it failed again, and long and short, all of my problems were more than likely caused by one l'il ole' bad RAM chip.

But, who would have guessed.

In any case, I'm back up! Thanks for waiting. ;)

John Cleese

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One of my all time favorite actors/comediens, John Cleese, has a very nice interview with Jennifer Senior of the NY Times. He's just too funny. It's hard to describe, but partly it's that I can always hear him saying things, and he has wonderful timing, and I hear that in my head when reading anything of his.

An example, speaking about Michael Caine:

SENIOR: Is it also harder to age gracefully in comedy?

CLEESE: Oh, I don't think so. I think if people know who you are . . . like if Michael Caine walks on screen, everybody knows it's Michael Caine, and they don't realize that he's 130 or whatever. Because it's Michael Caine, and we've loved Michael Caine for as long as we can remember, so we just see Michael Caine. We don't think, "Who is that extraordinarily ancient man?"

Just funny. Well, read it yourself. Cracks me up.

Gotta try this

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This is from a chef named Alain Passard and it seems like a brilliantly simple recepie--to my mind, the best kind.

Chicken with peanuts

In the bottom of a cast-iron casserole over low heat, brown a chicken that has been cut into eight pieces in salted butter; turn the pieces and half-way through the cooking time add a bowl of small onions, quartered, and a small cupful of crushed peanuts; let cook uncovered, arranging the chicken pieces among the onions and peanuts; at the end of the cooking time, sprinkle with chopped fresh tarragon, fleur de sel (fine sea salt) and a half teaspoonful of finely grated lemon zest.

Quick Recepie

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From the NY Times. Looks quick and easy. I'll let you know if it's any good.

1?1/2 pounds boneless chicken, preferably dark meat, in ?1/2- to 1-inch chunks
?1/2 cup flour, more as needed
4 tablespoons neutral oil, like corn or canola
Salt and pepper
2 tablespoons slivered garlic
?1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper, or to taste
1 cup ketchup.

1. Toss chicken with flour so that it is lightly dusted. Put 2 tablespoons oil in a large skillet, preferably nonstick, and turn heat to high. When oil smokes, add chicken in one layer. Sprinkle with salt and pepper.

2. When chicken browns on one side, toss it and cook until just about done: smaller pieces will take 5 minutes total, larger pieces about 10. Remove to a plate. Turn off heat and let pan cool for a moment.

3. Add remaining oil to pan and turn heat to medium high. Add garlic and cayenne pepper and cook, stirring, about 2 minutes. Add ketchup and stir; cook until ketchup bubbles, then darkens slightly. Return chicken to pan and stir to coat with sauce. Taste and adjust seasoning, then serve.

Yield: 4 servings.


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Are they kidding? This is the new Playstation hand held device. If the game looks like what's on the screen, I want one. BAD.


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Driving home from dinner tonight, the following conversation from the back seat, all Katie:

"The tiger walks through the tall grass and POUNCES on his prey and eats him. Then he walks around and POUNCES again. And then he POUNCES and POUNCES all over. Then he lies down in the tall grass and goes to sleep. And later, he will POUNCE again when he wakes up!"

Pounce? She's 3. Don't ask me...

What's up Tiger Lily?

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The Kodak Imagination booth at EPCOT did this to my 6 year old. Should I sue Walt?


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For those of you peeking in on this little blog, my family and I are at Disneyworld. I thought that a hit/miss list would be interesting, or at least useful. So, here are my impressions (yes, I do impressions...) of a few rides/attractions were successfull/not successfull with a 3 and a 6 year old (and their daddy):

1. Tower of Terror. This ride totally rocked, and my 6 year old, who is a total thrill seeker, was scared at the introductory parts (stuff with Rod Serling, and lots of lightning). However, the ride itself, which would scare the bejeezus out of any adult, didn't scare her at all. She loved it. It takes you up about 160 feet, and then drops you, randomly, and then brings you back up part way, drop, up, drop. My camera bag, around my neck, was floating in front of my face. It's too much...we went on twice! I wouldn't DREAM of taking my 3 year old on it.

2. Space Mountain. This ride is still amazing. It has such great twists and turns and the fact that it's near pitch black keeps you on edge for ages. I loved it and so did my 6 year old.

3. The Haunted Mansion. I still think it's pretty cool, but it scared my 6 year old silly. She was clutching at me the entire ride and literally jumped into my arms at one point. She was too young, I think.

4. Dumbo. No link for this one for some reason. Frankly, totally uninteresting, for my 3 year old and my 6 year old (and of course for me). It's a long line and a very short ride.

5. Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. Not bad as a roller coaster. Space mountain is better. Some good sharp turns.

6. Winnie the Pooh and the Hunnypots (or something like that). No link, again. This was cute. We all went on it, and except for some mildly scary scenes, it was fun for all.

OK, this post has taken 3 days and it's almost out of date already. I'll post it, and maybe add more later.

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This page is an archive of entries from May 2004 listed from newest to oldest.

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